Realy late or really early

Its one of those times. I'm so short on sleep, a few minutes to document this time wont make a difference. I'm so tired.

I feel suddenly silly, suddenly critical of me. I feel I've been giving way to vanity and not really thinking of anything significant the last few days. One does get carried away. There's a reason why these things are not important. So, the guilty pleasure of an undeserved compliment, the secret bubble of girlishness are disappointments to me when its late at night, when its dark and there's noone to look at and nothing to see but me. And I have nothing worthwhile to tell myself, to feel. I am being too harsh on myself, I did many worthwhile things. I spent time with friends, got to know them a little better, felt less restrained and more socially inclined, these things are worthwhile, company is the wine of life and wine is.. well.. you know what wine is.

It's just that I'm a little amused, a little surprised at how self centered I'm growing. I should do more musing at 4:30. Anything seems profound at this hour.