The spaceman says, "Everybody look down
It's all in your mind"

It's nice to have old friends around. It gives you a point of sanity. God knows I need sanity.

Bad experiences are good for me. they form strong barriers against repetition of self destructing behaviour. I found out someone I hurt accidentally in the past is in the city. The waves of guilt were fresh. I will remember that person forever, the bonds of guilt and all that. But forever more I will be antsy as hell if the possibility of hurting anyone arises.

Windmill

I'm feeling angry. I hate being persuaded by anyone into something I'm not sure about and then be judged by that person for what I do. My fault. But his/her fault too.

Concertita

I love a good concert. I love the Yeah yeah yeahs. What a great evening. I am spilling over with energy. Karen O is unbelievable and soooooooooo sexy in a vital presence-y way. I should mention my musical and other outings more often to you, Bloggy. It makes my relations to you more real

Unhappiness is best defined as the difference between our talents and our expectations. 
-Edward de Bono 

That quote calmed me down. It made me feel that railing against something I could not change and would not change was useless and reflected on me as a person. Resignation is a talent in itself.

Later: Wait? Now I read it again, I feel it could go both ways. Resignation or working harder to make that talent happen. In the case of not being able to go home though, resignation would be the first order of things.

"A recent study in hamsters showed that sildenafil aided in a 50% faster recovery from shifts comparable to eastward travel experienced by humans and was effective starting at low doses. However, this use has not been tested in humans and is considered an off-label use by the drug's manufacturers.The presence of low-level light at night also accelerates recovery rate in both east- and west-travelling hamsters of all ages by 50%; this is thought to be related to simulation of moonlight"

Aww. East travelling and west travelling hamsters and their little hamster wheels.

I miss my dog. It's one of those days. I miss my dog, I miss my family, I miss Rajesh. 

My dearest Brutus

It's the usual end of the quarter crabbiness. I want to have Rajesh back. 

I was talking to my mirror the other day

Me: Hmm, my nose seems to be bigger

Mirror: Understatement

Me: Cleopatra had a big nose

Mirror: Cleopatra had a lot going for her

Me: I don't like you.

David Reed

is dead

A song is accusing me of not caring and I want to rise up in arms and defend myself. I do, I do care. I care deeply, every wind brings a whiff of stimulus to my mind and I respond always. You know me, my face reflects every thought and I am always thinking. If you must accuse, accuse me of not caring long enough. Caring too much about everything keeps you from focusing all those rays to a point of burning

Get in touch with your Inner Inca

I had a conversation yesterday with some people about eggless cakes and I had a sudden wave of nostalgia for Whatever Cafe. Ah, the food. So good. And such a wonderful quirky atmosphere. 

Being out with couples exhausts me sometimes. I feel very solo.

More alive. I have some work today I'm actually looking forward to do. But the sun is out. I see a conflict of interest here. Hmm.

The four group members sat together today for morning class in the back row. All of us bent double by our hacking coughs. You could have named it the TB Sanitarium row.

Later: Slept like a baby from one to five. how pleasant not to struggle to sleep against the coughing. Could it be? Am I getting better?

Even Later: No, the cough's still around. And its my proper bedtime now. Growl. cough-cough

forever sick.

I feel a glow of happiness when work comes back graded well. Glow glow glow.

When there is arun in the stock market

The power of the space bar

True Evil

Matthias Rath

http://www.badscience.net/2009/04/matthias-rath-steal-this-chapter/#more-1088

Just got a letter from the kid in India. Feeling all warm and fuzzy. She sounds sweet but I guess she's kind of young and someone sat with her and wrote it out for her. Must not expect lisping angels.

Star Trek

Here I go again

Later: back. Some of the visuals are so beautiful. There's something lovely about light and space and lens flares.

Even later: Salon on Nimoy

" He's got the face of an actor who's actually lived, not of one who's tried to hide the effects of living. His youth is alive in him, as opposed to being an indistinct, vaguely remembered thing. And he's perfectly at home in a movie that recognizes how reinvention can be a form of rejuvenation"

It's good to remember that age can be a beautiful thing.

Star trek

An act of love. Beautiful and engaging. I am so pleased.

(holding self back from hyperbole that wants to spill from my lips and fingers.)

Stress test

I'm bouncing between all three of my subjects. I have a midterm exam tomorrow and I'm ploughing away at that. I have a paper due tomm morning in Central banks and I keep referring back to that every hour or so when someone calls me with doubts and I have hw due tomorrow and I have to answer my groupmates.

And I'm sick with fever. How on earth is this going to work out well?

Bloggiversary

I completely missed it. This is now the third year I'm writing in you, dearest Bloggy. You've been a source of strength and a dumping ground for excess and unnecessary thinking. May I write in you till I pop off.

Shame

I think that's the most powerful feeling I can have. The memories which stay with me longest are the ones where I feel intensely ashamed or embarassed. I can potentially wake up writhing in agony over some memory from middle school. Other memories exist strongly too, but not with the power of these. 

That doesn't say much about me. Shame/embarassment is linked strongly to self love. 

Still, I can use it. In a case of right and wrong when my moral sense won't wake up, I can always try and imagine the embarassment of being put in the wrong. I can writhe plenty. Whatever works.

Parlour Tricks

So what I can tie knots in a cherry stem with my tongue?

Edit: Drunk post. Pardon me Bloggy