I haven't read Lord of the Rings for two years now. Hmm... That's a bit of a record.

I seem to have transitioned straight from an MBA student full of energy and optimism to a housewife with groceries, furniture and housekeeping on her mind. The transition is difficult. Am a little depressed

Edit: I think it was the jet lag and a keen urge to start work. thats what I've been training for, no? Am much more zen now :)

Was browsing the NYTimes and found out they had a vows section. I couldn't figure out whether it was meant to be satire or (more probably) not. And if the latter, don't they realise how they're setting themselves up for idiotic prodding?

Airplane Ballet

I was parked at the tarmac along with all the other hundreds of passengers to Tokyo, in the plane. And to my left was the runway, just where the planes approach their 300 kmph speed and transition to lift off. I understand now what a busy airport means. Eighteen planes took off in rapid succession. And do I mean rapid. Every 30 seconds.

I've seen planes take off before of course, in life and movies. I know how it works of course whether you want to go Newton/Bernoulli/Pascal on it. Yet to see them all happily defy gravity, effortlessly, strongly and powerfully was something else.

Floop, floop, floop, they tripped up and arced away. One stage left, one forward, one stage right and so on in succession. Like a corps de ballet. Or if I was to be less flamboyant in my similes and metaphors I would admit there was something simple to it all. Because that's what planes do; fly.

If you love an airplane, set it free.

Chicago cries for me

Howling weeping sobbing baby. I smile sadly out of the window at It. I don't want to start but I could so easily join you. I have been happier here than I could have guessed and I've been sad too. I could go on with a barrage of verbs and superlatives but we know what I mean and feel.

Don't cry for me, Chicago. Or cry now and be calm for my flight time. I am not fond of turbulence.

The eyeliner element

Leaving on a jet plane and all that. I am not thinking about it because I suspect that there is a lot of water behind those floodgates which will ebb by themselves once I make this change. Parting is *not* such sweet sorrow. To leave is to die a little but arriving will shuck the life right back into me I know from past experiences.

So, the element of the month is Antimony. A Slate article reminded me of it and after radium and certain isotopes of uranium and maybe some others that don't come to mind, Antimony has one of the more interesting histories. And I am not speaking of discoveries. There have been many interesting heartbreaking and dramatic discoveries which I am not thinking of at the moment. So lets all think of Stebium but keep carefully away from it.

I pack. I sleep. I eat. And sometimes I move the order of that around. I occasionally meet people. It's all blurring together. Am ready to go home.

You'd think with everything lined up the way it is I'd be feeling very set?

No, I can't really understand why I feel this uncertainty for life coming ahead. I feel impatient like I want to flip to the end of the book and see how things turn out. I am going to have to set some goals for the near future soon. I don't feel comfortable walking out nakedly into tomorrow.

I look at my friends and enemies and I wonder if I do what I do for the latter. I won't be sneered at or pitied over. Pride and happiness sustain me. I like living today but I also like living out an ideal for the peeping toms.