I am a bad kid. I haven't written here forever. But I've been so busy filling up your sister blog. I want to remember everything of that holy trip forever. But there's actual writing from the time dated there. I had taken a long a little notebook. I thought I ought to be honest in it at least, no matter where else I'm not honest.
So here I'm going to transcribe that into this. So at least you know me.

"Went for night safari in the boat. Woke up many peacefully slumbering denizens of the forest. I have to sayit was so beautiful. The moon was so full and huge in the sky, the stars were out and a mist was softly rolling in. The water was completely still except where our boats rumbled in. The bright beams from the boat lamps sent out long rays. It was unbelieveably beautiful. Kingfishers slept wideyed on low branches over the water, herons prowled with angry red eyes and monkeys slept in the high branches, their forms more visible in the dark against the shining sky than with the boat lights.

All of this is serving to make me more introverted and quiet. I often get the feeling people are not very fond of me. But thats in my gloomy moods. And I admit I can be quite forbidding.

The morning was fabulous too. I mean the afternoon really for we didn't get to here till then. the jungle fanned out in every direction.

Sad to say that though this trip is about the flora and fauna I have the urge to sit back and stare at how beautiful everything is. And it is.. It's impossible to decsribe. This trip, instead of making me forget myself, is making me remember who I am and what I am really about as a human being. As a human, my heart leaps at green things, longs for running water, dislikes the cold wet rain when I am out in it for too long, rejoices at the snugness when the rain is pattering overhead. Pattering? I should have said drumming! Loud, louder, louder! The thrumming drumming leaping rythms of rain.

In other news I am slightly held up digestive-wise, hungry, a little amorous. I am an animal in fact! I didn't bathe tonight. I am driven by my digestion and sex drive. Its the humid head and cicada song. Singapore will seem quieter and I suspect in the quiet I'll find my soul again to moderate my passions.

If I was more innocent, I'd talk to you about finding God in the wilderness. But I'd be wrong. There is no peace and quiet here. Life is much much more brutal here. God I find amongst men, amongst symbols of our solidity. God is not here.

Tomorrow we're off on another river safari. I'll be very very upset if there are nto crocodiles. God's a croc, sometimes."

Don't think me blasphemous. I am who I am. We saw 4 crocs the next morning.