These days I'm something like the opposite of a beggar. I see someone and immediately start thinking of what I can give away to them

Me: Would you like my plant?

Me: My blue coat would fit you nicely

Me: I know my gloves would go with that

Me: A beautiful wrought iron dining table with glass top and matching chairs needs a home

Me: I can't part with my dinner set, alas I have to and I think yours is the right home for it

Me: Vacuum cleaner? I have two!

My friends will soon have much to remember me by...