a) You can be a nice person and help people out in their times of need.
b) Or you can be a bad person and refuse to burden yourself with someone else's negative vibes.
It seems like an easy answer (a) and I always thought so and do continue to think so, but can see why people opt for option b at times. People down on their luck leave you feeling exhausted when they rip you apart for being in a better place. They talk of nothing else and don't accept anything but passive listening. And I do listen, I do care, I do want to help. But I hate it that they drain me of my own energy and enthusiasm. Why should it be a zero sum game? Why must there be a feeding off of one another?
And it makes me think. Am I like this when I'm down? Do I curl up and whine always? I wonder. I'm thinking of the MBA app time when I was so entirely depressed. I'm thinking of the job application time when I was so stressed out that I couldn't eat. I think perhaps I am one of these people too. What is the reconciling factor between these two extremes? Me being one of them and me not being able to support them? I think it must be love and some kind of personal strength. You have to love someone to be able feed them your own energy and not care. You need empathy and tough skin to resist the pressure to be dragged down yourself.
The answer is still (a). I just have to be a better person from the inside to not mind.
